Welcome (back) to the Frayed Feather!

I really mean it when I say I want to be super consistent and provide value through this newsletter; I’m just learning how to do that, honestly.

Writing in my personal time has been a journey to figure out what works for me since I’m mostly writing in my day job as well.

By the time I start writing for this newsletter, I just feel I’m not sharp enough to give the value I want to create for readers.

But I’ve learned to just go full sendies with it, and over time, I will get better and better.

The 5 DO’s and DON’Ts of youth engagements. Let’s jump into it! ☝️🤓

Many people plan youth engagements with good intentions, but we must step back from our feelings and consider the impact the space and our actions have on youth participants.

When young Indigenous people are brought into a space without care, structure, or power-sharing, they often feel tokenized, invisible, and/or retraumatized.

If we are serious about youth reconciliation, we need to be serious about how we invite, include, and treat youth in our engagements.

This list is a great place to get started.

Firstly, the DOs!

1. Co-design with youth - Ask the youth what they want BEFORE you plan your session. Avoid falling into the trap of validating your approach with youth feedback; use their feedback to inform the plan.

“Nothing about us without” is a design principle, not a catchy saying.

Validating an approach with youth means that some decisions are final upon the youth’s arrival into the project, meaning there is no chance for them to change the environment or result.

For example, it’s common practice for youth to be engaged at the end of a project where the research is done and findings have been analyzed. This results in youth feeling like they have no real input into the project, tokenizing their participation.

2. Pay Youth for Their Time - If we’re asking for lived experience, ideas, or participation, that’s labour. Employment at its core is time for money; don’t treat young people’s time differently.

Unpaid youth engagement often leads to burnout and a lack of interest in future opportunities. Nurture the relationships you have with young people by paying them.

It is common practice to control youth’s spending habits by giving them gift cards instead of pre-paid credit cards or money, but I disagree with this approach.

There is a risk in providing cash to vulnerable youth because maybe they will buy substances, weapons, or gamble with it. But it is also dignifying to receive cash for their time, just like an employee would.

It’s not up to us to decide what young people can spend their money on, because in my experience, they’re resourceful enough to get what they want anyway. I would rather them earn money from me than an unsafe method like stealing or prostitution. (harm reduction)

3. Make an inclusive Environment - Create agreements together, let young people know they can speak honestly, but also don’t have to share trauma.

Young Indigenous people should not have to tell us their story to belong in the room.

I have an “opt-out” clause in everything I do, meaning participants can always tell me no and I’ll not pressure them about their answer.

In practice, this may look like me calling upon a random participant to give their thoughts, and if they say “pass,” then I move on without losing momentum.

The best way to promote healthy boundaries is by setting some at the start of engagements. Let people know they will not be pressured to speak up, and have multiple ways to provide input like writing, drawing, AND speaking aloud.

4. Be Transparent About Next Steps - Young people are providing feedback, but may not fully understand the process or timeline of the project. Show them how their feedback will be included in a report, policy, or project.

Credibility is built when young people see their words lead to action.

This part is easy, but it has to be more than just giving a one-sentence “I’m going to record your feedback into a ‘What We Heard’ report.”

These technical terms, AKA “jargon,” mean little to most youth. We must unpack what they mean and provide insight into how their feedback may appear in the project.

For example, instead of saying it’s going into a report, ask “are you folks familiar with a What We Heard report?” and then explain what it is, what it’s used for, and who will read it.

This breakdown of info builds trust with the participants because we ensure they understand everything about the next steps.

5. Be Grateful for the Results - No matter the feedback quality or turnout level, we must always thank young people for their time. Say thank you, share a recap or photo, and tell them what’s next.

Following up is one way trust is built between generations.

The biggest challenge with youth feedback on projects is that youth sometimes lack experience with the topic we are discussing with them.

Their lack of experience can lead to unhelpful feedback because they don’t have the contextual knowledge to give what we were looking for in the engagement.

In these cases, we must take the pressure off the youth to understand our projects and instead look in the mirror and say, “I didn’t educate them enough about what I needed before this engagement, and the feedback suffered.”

Be grateful for whatever you have because the youth who come to these engagements are few and far between. They could be spending their time doing anything, but they decided to go to an engagement, hoping to learn things and meet people.

Now let’s get into the DON’Ts.

1. Don’t Use Youth as Decoration or Performers - If you want youth to be part of your engagement festivities in the form of a land acknowledgement or drumming, you need to give them power in planning.

This happens to me personally all the time. People ask me to get up and speak publicly just because I’m a young Indigenous person who speaks well on the microphone.

It’s often framed as an opportunity to gain experience, but it’s really because no one else wants to get in front of an audience and speak aloud; it makes them nervous.

So instead of someone owning up to a responsibility, they half-hazardly bring a youth in to take on the role that no one wanted, that’s tokenism. If we bring youth in, they need to be part of EVERYTHING, not just the things we don’t want to do.

2. Don’t Overload the Schedule - Youth are not conference robots. They need food, breaks, and time to chill.

A pet peeve of mine is that it’s common to criticize the education system for only supporting a rigid way of learning, yet so many conferences take the same approach.

We sit down for an hour and a half, a 15-minute break, another hour and a half presentation, a lunch break, another hour and a half presentation, a 15-minute break, etc.

As someone who failed grade 9 and 10 English but was exempted from English in college because I scored so high on the skills assessment test, I know firsthand how important the delivery system for education is.

Young people need different methods of learning than sitting through presentations. They need interactive exercises and enthusiastic facilitators who will connect their experiences to the things they are learning.

3. Don’t Assume Every Youth is Ready to Share - Sharing trauma is never a requirement to be in reconciliation spaces.

This goes back to DO #3 about making inclusive spaces. We can be a soft landing for young people to share their hardships, but that should never be the goal in an engagement setting. (Unless you’re a support group)

Indigenous youth are almost guaranteed to have hardship in one way or another growing up, so our spaces need to be empowering and not seen as a place that forces them to relive their traumas.

I see many youth engagements focused on the challenges they experience, and not enough focused on building solutions for them.

One of the best ways to avoid speaking directly on challenges is to frame the questions requesting solutions that youth would come up with to a societal challenge.

This frame creates the environment for youth to speak on their challenges from a strength-based perspective and be empowered by providing solutions for the next generation.

4. Don’t Ignore Power Dynamics - Be honest about who is funding the event, facilitating, and making final decisions.

Naming power helps build trust. There is nothing inherently wrong with power; it’s more about its use and people trusting the leadership with power.

Similar to #4 about “demystifying” the process, let’s not be secretive about power dynamics. Being honest about all the details builds trust with Indigenous youth.

Even if the power dynamics are not super relevant for the engagement, it onboards the youth into how this engagement came together, giving background info to inform their session.

We must consider that the details of funding, facilitating, and decision-making are common knowledge for event planners, but youth may not even realize that information is available.

For example, there is a culture of large corporations sponsoring events and campaigns but not supportive programs while being positioned as reconciliation partners.

Breaking down key funder information can help youth recognize patterns and make more informed decisions in the future about the events/engagements they are walking into.

5. Don’t End Without a Next Step - Youth want to know: what’s next? Will there be more sessions? Will they be involved again?

If there is no continuity, we are simply extracting information from youth, and that is unsatisfying to hear as a young leader wanting to make transformative change.

In DO #4, I mentioned being transparent about the next step, but I’m putting it down here in the DON’Ts that it must be included because it’s that important.

This is the easiest to implement if you want to level up your youth engagement. Just tell youth what you’re going to do next, and why it matters.

I train youth on how not to get tokenized, and I get them to ask three questions to assess whether coherent actions are being taken after the engagement.

The three questions are:

“What are the next steps?”
“What is the short-term plan for the next 3 months?”
“How can Indigenous youth stay involved?”

You are way ahead of the pack if you can answer these three questions.

Running a youth engagement is about creating a good experience, not just extracting what we need from young people.

When Indigenous youth are seen, heard, and valued meaningfully, they walk away feeling momentum for reconciliation; like good things are happening.

The harsh reality is that harm in youth engagement isn’t done out of cruelty; it’s done out of not knowing better.

If you’re serious about youth reconciliation, I invite you to take the next step with Frayed Feathers.

Whether through a free Take Flight workshop, using our Advocate’s Guide to Youth Reconciliation, or simply subscribing to this newsletter.

You’re helping build a world where young Indigenous people are trusted, not tokenized.

Miigwetch,
Bailey 🪶